


finally i'm okay

by livesybaby



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Ross says something homophobic that people might find offensive, mechanic!aaron, mentions of self harm, needy!aaron
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-31 11:08:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6467830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livesybaby/pseuds/livesybaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a little oneshot I wrote. Aaron's having a bad day and all he needs is Robert.</p>
            </blockquote>





	finally i'm okay

It was a bad day from the moment my eyes opened, a cold Wednesday in April full of rain. I woke up expecting to be clutched comfortingly against his chest but the clock on the bedside told me it was half nine and he’d already left for work over two hours ago. I sighed and dragged myself up, running a hand across my face as I desperately tried to look alive. I skipped breakfast and grabbed a coffee instead, rushing out of the door but forgetting my coat. I don’t have time to turn back so I curse under my breath, shoving my hands in my pockets as I head off towards the garage and did I mention? It’s cold and fucking raining.

The morning goes as slow as possible, I’ve got Debbie chewing my ear off about being late again and even though I throw myself into an MOT check on a green Toyota I can’t shake the feeling of some fat fucker sitting on my chest. Debbie goes to get lunch and insists that I work through mine to make up for the lost time, I don’t argue because I don’t have the energy. Ross arrives back for his shift and his arrogant swagger pisses me off before he even speaks, I knock the toolbox from the workbench whilst I clatter about and end up on the floor picking up all the spilled tools. 

Ross makes an offhand comment about the only thing blokes like me are ever on our knees for and I lose it. Normally I ignore him or throw a witty comeback but today is not normal and I throw punches instead. I’ve stormed out of the garage before I even have time to think, I know Cain’s going to be on my back later because it’s the fourth time this week but my mind is saying fuck it as I get into my car. Typical for today the fucking thing won’t start and I roll my eyes remembering something Brenda had said the other day about it being ironic to have a mechanic with a dodgy motor. I shove the keys back in my pocket and make a run for the bus shelter, catching the 529 with just enough time to secure the back row before the school kids take over.

I find myself sat in a booth in Costa, the coffee tastes like piss but at least it’s warm here. I check my phone for the first time today and I’ve got a message from him, he’s telling me how much he loves me and how he wishes he could have stayed in bed with me this morning. Yeah I wish that too, I mumble sadly thinking about how much better today could have been. He calls me on his lunch break and I try to put on a positive tone but he sees right through it, I know you Aaron he says and I tell him the truth.

I arrive back in the village before half six, the garage has been locked up and thankfully Cain isn’t on the warpath. I promised to go see Mum after work but I don’t have the energy so I head back home straight away, the rain has subsided now but my hoodie is still damp and it’s making my entire body shiver. I switch the heating on as soon as I get in and undress for a shower, the hot water cascades down my body and turns my skin a deep red but it feel so much better than being outside and my previously aching muscles are starting to loosen. I wrap myself in a towel, it’s a large green one with palm trees on that I shoved in my bag when I moved out of the pub. It’s old and rough compared to the white ones we’ve got in the airing cupboard but it reminds me of home. 

My eyes flicker to the shelf as I look in the mirror, my shaving kit is there and my memory flicks back to the first time I broke a razor to get the blade out. I shiver at the thought and force myself out of the bathroom, I know if I contemplate any longer my mind will go into autopilot and I’ll do something drastic. I’m in the bedroom now drying myself off and looking for something to wear, my shirts are in the wash and I’ve forgot to put it on so I fumble through Roberts drawers to find something suitable. I pull out an oversized batman T-shirt that he bought from a convention a few years back, they didn’t have his size but he really liked the design so settled for the only one they had. I smiled at the memory as my fingers traced the faded logo, he’d worn this so many times and it made me feel warm inside as I put it on. 

I also helped myself to a pair of his Calvin Klein’s, they were tighter than my own but comfortable all the same. I nearly shut the drawer but then spotted a white corner sticking out from under his clothes; I pulled it out into view and saw that it was a photo of me. I remembered him taking the picture last Valentine’s day, I had begged him to delete it hating the thought of a picture of me with my shirt off but he’d obviously liked it enough to keep it in his dresser drawer all this time. I smiled at the memory, sliding the photo back into its hiding place and closing the drawer. 

I sat on the sofa with the TV off, enjoying the silence and counting down the minutes until he came home. It was nearly 8 when the door opened and in he strode like a guardian angel with a blonde halo around his fucking head. Suddenly all the badness of the day had evaporated and my chest felt light and airy. He puts a carrier bag on the kitchen surface, Chinese food he says and he’s got me a curry without the onions because he knows that’s how I like it. I barely get to thank him before he’s pulled me into a warm embrace, he’s whispering I-Love-You’s into my ear and I can smell his aftershave, it’s making me dizzy and lightheaded but he brings me back to earth with his lips on my forehead and his hands on the bottom of my back. 

We spend the rest of the evening cuddled into each other on the sofa, and if you’d have asked me five years ago for a cuddle I’d have laughed but nothing feels more perfect and homely and safe than my head on his chest and his hands in my hair and our legs tangled together underneath that stupid red blanket that Pearl had crocheted for us. He’s promising we’ll pull a sicky tomorrow and spend the whole day in bed and all thoughts of negativity are washed from my brain and my heart is pounding and finally I’m okay.


End file.
